September 12, 2014
Trust lawyers in Fair Oaks help all sorts of people deal with the subject no one wants to talk about—what happens after you die. When your loved ones are grieving, it can be hard to devote proper time and energy to the details of your funeral and post-mortem affairs. If you plan some of this in advance, your children can be sure to respect your wishes, while also having the time they need to grieve.
One important issue to discuss with your children is how you want your body to be handled after death. Do you want to be cremated or buried? Do you want a large headstone, or something simple? If you are cremated, do you want to be in an urn or interred at a cemetery? Would you like a religious service, and if so, what kind? It may seem obvious to you what you would like, but sometimes your children may not know, and may end up fighting at a time they should be coming together to mourn.
Many people pre-pay their funeral expenses, so it is important to let your children know if you have. Trust lawyers in Fair Oaks have witnessed times where there was a plot paid for, but the children didn’t know, and so paid for another!
What about your obituary? Trust lawyers in Fair Oaks see cases where relatives are angry because the children got the details wrong in the paper. If you pre-write your own obituary, you can make sure that all of the details are correct, and that it says precisely what you want it to. It can be humorous, serious, or a little of both; if you write it, you control the message.
Have you written a will? You’d be surprised by how many fights happen once a parent passes away. If you want your mother’s china to go to one child and your father’s tools to go to another, be sure to put this in writing. Better yet, have your children over to talk about what each one may want when you are gone. It’s awkward, yes, but by finding this out and detailing it in your will, you can save a lot of fighting after the funeral.
What about a living will or healthcare directive? This is one of the best uses of an estate planning lawyer. You need to have, in writing, what you would like to happen in the event that you are ill. Do you want to be resuscitated? How much intervention do you want? Do you want to be left on life support? Fights over this can divide a family, so knowing in advance what you want, and having it be on a legal document, can make things so much easier in a time of need.
Part of a Fair Oaks trust lawyer’s job is to help your children to suffer as little as possible once you pass away. In order to make this happen, however, you need to be sure that they know what your wishes are for your funeral, for your assets, and for your body in ill health. By writing all of this down ahead of time, you can save everyone grief at a time when they need the space to mourn.